Old Wineskins and New Beginnings: Why Change Feels So Hard


A wineskin is an ancient container made of animal skin. Usually, a goat is used to transport liquids such as water, olive oil, and wine. Is trying to bring motivation, or even change, to an organization like putting new wine in an old wineskin?

The old wineskin has become brittle and set in place. It had done its job for years with no problem, but the new wine hasn’t fermented yet, and as it expands, it will split the old container.

The Bible, Mark 2:22, used this example to teach about dealing with change. “And no man putteth new wine into old bottles: else the new wine doth burst the bottles, and the wine is spilled, and the bottles will be marred: but new wine must be put into new bottles.” ……. And no one puts new wine into old wineskins; otherwise, the new wine will burst the skins, and it will be spilled out, and the skins will be ruined. But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins. And no one, after drinking old wine, wishes for new, for he says, ‘The old is good enough.


Good news for the Old Wineskins: A fresh wineskin can be a new wineskin, but it can also refer to an old wineskin that has been reconditioned. A reconditioned wineskin is as supple as new and can hold new wine. An old wineskin must be cleaned and soaked in oil to recondition it. The wineskin is soaked until it is rejuvenated to its supple, soft state, ready for the new wine. So old wineskins are not thrown away, but are only used to hold old wine. It can be made fresh again to have new wine!

Of course, we’re talking about people, not wineskins.

People, in their way, can also seem brittle and set in place. The problem is often the perception of what is happening around them. The roadblock is often just the attitude that “this is the way we have always done this.”

A person who has done something the same way for years can seem brittle or inflexible. Several years ago, I knew some managers at a small distribution warehouse with limited space. Jim, the warehouse manager, had a new boss who expected tasks to be done in ways he was not used to.

Changing things that had always been done one way for years became an obstacle for Jim. The last straw was when an item bought weekly for years, 50 cases at a time, was changed to 100 cases, and the order frequency was changed to once every two weeks. Jim knew the reasons for the change and the plan, but he did not feel comfortable with all the changes. This led him to quit his job after 35 years and advance to warehouse manager. 

Change was not foreign to this company's environment, which had grown significantly over the years. I was more than that “they had always done that way.” It was about him always being the sole decision-maker.

Over the years Jim worked for this company, it had expanded its warehouse size many times. He faced increased reserve levels on many inventory items and changes to accommodate buying brackets. If he hadn’t been flexible, he would not have made it far as he did.

Why did Jim become brittle and set in place?  He was upset by what he was afraid the future would bring. After Jim left, he enrolled in some classes at the local community college and took some computer classes. Perhaps for Jim, it was more than just turning brittle and unchangeable. Maybe he was just smart enough to see that he needed more skill, but he still was not flexible enough to come and talk about that side of the issue before leaving.

The poet Maya Angelou said, “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Jim didn’t feel good about his new manager, and that reality was far more critical than the challenges of warehouse changes. The new manager didn’t know Jim and

Source: https://connectedeventsmatter.com/soft-ski...

12 Steps to Finding Your Passion

When you have a desire, you can grow it by adding passion, and when you do, you will find motivation. Passion will continue to influence your motivation towards your goal. Passion is the grease that turns desire into something of value.

Passion is an intense desire that can get you to do unique and challenging things. Passion is an emotion that begs to be acted upon. Without action, passion yields no fruitful results. Passion is the fuel in the fire of action. When you have a passion for something, you love it even when you hate it.

Passion can be, but it isn’t just about work. It points to your intense emotions and feelings for someone or something.

12 Steps to Find Your Passion

Do Things you love to do

Read about a variety of subjects

Listen to others before talking

Think about nature | Feel the Sun

Quit talking and start doing.

You can find a website about positive influences. 

Get to know yourself better

Start a journal

Embrace a mindfulness practice

Find a coach

Surround yourself with others who share your passions

Find your true north – Your authentic self

Soft Skills Will Make or Break You: So Find Out What They Are

The polished apple gets picked, and management seems always to have the most polish or, better put, soft skills. You can hire someone with specific hard skills for the job needing to be done, but it isn’t easy to find people engaged with enough soft skills to fit into the organization.

We pick our friends, for the most part, based on their soft skills. But, of course, if something is broken in our house, we like the neighbor with the right hard skills and hope they have enough soft skills (caring, empathy, and concern) not to be offended. So, of course, a lack of soft skills is a bigger problem, but it should be mentioned in the job posting.


Hard skills vs. soft skills

The key differences between hard and soft skills are how they are gained and used in everyday life and the workplace. Hard skills are often achieved through education or specific training. They include competencies like how to use a particular machine, software, or another tool.

Soft skills are often seen as personality traits you may have spent your whole life developing. They are called upon when you manage your time, communicate with others, or talk about a problematic situation for the first time.


Soft Skills are People Skills.

Ability to work in a team

Ability to make decisions and solve problems

Ability to plan, organize, and prioritize

Ability to communicate verbally with people

Ability to obtain & process information

Ability to get along with others

Adaptability

Assertiveness

Attitude

Awareness

Body Language

Caring

Completing tasks on time

Communication

Communication Verbal

Communication Non-Verbal

Communication Visual

Communication Written

Critical Thinking

Collaboration

Cooperation

Competitiveness

Conflict Resolution

Creative Thinking

Courtesy

Dispute Resolution

Decision Making

Dependability

Dealing with Difficult People

Emotional Intelligence

Empathy

Etiquette

Ethics

Focused

Organized

Giving Feedback

Honesty

Helpfulness

Interpersonal Skills

Kindness

Listening

Leadership Skill

Loyalty

Likeability

Manners

Public Speaking

Punctuality

Perseverance

Persistence

Problem-solving

Positive Attitude

People Skills

Politeness

Resilience

Self Awareness

Self Confidence

Self-Motivation

Teamwork

Tolerance

Time Management

Trustworthy

Work Ethic

(And More)

It is no coincidence that management and leaders have the most soft organizational skills today. But, as you ponder, think that this is why they tell you they value hard skills more in their job search skill requirements.

6 Skills for You to be better at listening and reading

Active listening and giving feedback can be challenging. People perceive the best listeners to sit quietly and occasionally ask questions that tell them all they need to know. Sitting there silently nodding does not prove that a person is listening. Good listening is much more than being silent while the other person talks.

Listening Skills are the quiet soft skills “sauce” that can make or break a career. Have you ever had a client, customer, boss, or colleague have to repeat things to you several times or look at you as if they needed clarification on whether you were understanding them or even paying attention?

When you read, you are listening, but when you are reading, you sometimes are not thinking about what the words mean. Understanding what the words you read are intended to convey is listening also.

6 Skills

that will help you listen and understand

  1. Paying attention

  2. Withholding judgment

  3. Reflecting on what was said

  4. Clarifying what is being said

  5. Summarizing what you thought was said

  6. Sharing what was agreed on

Creativity is both a Soft Skill and a Hard Skill

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Creativity is a valuable workplace skill, not just for its practical applications in developing new ideas, increasing efficiency, and devising solutions to complex problems, but also for the personal growth it can bring. While you may have natural creativity skills in certain forms, it is a skill that can be learned and developed over time, offering you the opportunity to expand your horizons and reach new heights in your professional journey.

Soft skills relate to how you work. Soft skills include people, communication, listening, and time management.

So, is creativity a soft skill? Creativity is usually considered a soft skill, but some aspects of creativity can be considered hard skills. Soft skills are general personality traits that are relevant across many industries and roles, while hard skills are job-specific abilities that are acquired through training and education.

Being a Good Listener is a Soft Skill

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“Be a good listener,” Dale Carnegie advised in his 1936 classic How to Win Friends and Influence People. “Ask questions the other person will enjoy answering.”

Rather than pushing your point of view when it is very different, the other person uses a curious approach to communication. An example would be meeting the other end of view with a question like: “I never thought of that point of view. What is it that leads you to that conclusion.”

Six things needed to be a good listener

  • #1 Your thoughts have not drifted, and you are in the here & now.

  • #2 Distractions don't get in the way of what the person is saying

  • #3 You're excited and curious to hear what is said

  • #4 You're sincere and open-minded about the questions and haven’t prejudged the anticipated answers

  • #5 Your hearing, sight, and other senses are working

  • #6 You ask the right questions.

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“Hearing Aids Matter”

Manners and Etiquette are Important Soft Skills

Good manners are soft skills and reflect respect, courtesy, and consideration for others. Proper manners communicate what kind of person we are to other people. Good manners are a soft skill that often gets overlooked when considering the soft skills a person needs.

“Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter which fork you use.” Emily Post

Manners are said to be actions that characterize relationships with other people, such as social graces, communication, cooperation, honesty, respect, responsibility, friendliness, and optimism. Social graces and etiquette refer to manners.

Manners can hold a person back and be why they are not promoted, but this problem should be addressed in reviews.

Is an Informational Interview part of the steps in simple sales approach?


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Don’t ask your customer if she would like to buy a box of chocolates; ask her if she likes dark or light chocolate. Don’t ask if the customer wants to buy a car; ask them what color they like. Find out what the person likes and show them how to get what they like.

Consider this question: what is more important to you, a lower food cost at your restaurant or a unique menu item? The next step is to talk about what the client wants or likes when the answer is found.

If you want to be a good friend, you need to find out what your potential friend is interested in and then become interested in the same thing by asking questions to learn more.

Do these thoughts have anything to do with looking for a job or finding out about an industry or career path? Of course, they do. You have to ask questions and understand what will require of you if you take the next step and seek job opportunities.

This isn’t new news, but the label “Informational Interview” seems a little unique, even if it isn’t. The approach has always worked and is just the basics of job hunting and many sales approaches.

Those that try to sell someone something, even their skills, have always found success easier if they spend some research and fact-finding time.

An informational interview for a job seeker occurs when a meeting is set up to learn about a potential job of interest. It isn’t an interview, and the job seeker asks questions to learn rather than make an immediate sale. The goal is information.

The same thing happens when a salesperson spends time learning what a client wants and needs. Unfortunately, the process isn’t new. It is just something that many salespeople, as well as job seekers, miss.